more BADASS Evangelion (if possible?)
by DabDad
Summary: Lemons, fights and romance: better mix than this one... please read the small first introduction for more info.
1. Brief Introduction

Formal disclaimer (just in the first chapter):

I do not own the Evangelion series, Gainax or the music that I'll write the lyrics of.

This is a non-profit fanfic made for other people to read and it won't be used to earn.

Normal disclaimer:

This is going to be a fanfic that takes the basic idea of Evangelion and then totally fucks with it. I still need to decide if I'm going to include some lemons (intended as sex) so just tell me in the comments what you think about it (there won't be any in the starting chapters, apart from some kisses, found already in the anime series). I'll also be adding a som side characters. I'd also like to underline the fact that I'm going to get some ideas from other fanfics so don't start getting mad at me saying "You wrote the same thing that other dude wrote so now we'll find your home and plant 78 nails in your head while you're sleeping". I'll also include some basses so I will write their titles if you can't get the drops. I won't be saying it in the chapters so before any misunderstandings happen the kiss Asuka and Shinji had because she was "bored" never happened. Some parts of the story can be completely wrong according to original story so you'll have to deal with it. To properly read this fanfic: "…": for speeches, '…': for thoughts. At last I need to apologize for any English mistakes but I'm Italian and now that it's summer I can't practice it. Should be all for now without any further to say…

P.S. I was almost forgetting about it: -Baka, Dumpkopf (I think you write like that, if not tell me): stupid

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-Hope ya enjoy ;-D-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x


	2. A Rough Awakening

['Relax! Dont do it! When you want to just do it'

'Relax! Don't do it! When you want to just do it'

'Relax! Don't do it! When you want to just do it']

Shinji's eyes slowly opened as he started to get annoyed by the fact that he kept seeing a Derek Zoolander with a shiny silver suit each time impressing him with a Magnum expression, only that it was his father's face doing it. Quickly recovering from such a shock which happened so early in the morning, he sat up rubbing his eyes which slowly started to focus the tidy room he was in. Checking upon the clock, he discovered it was 7:30 in the morning so he had another 30 minutes of bed. Although having such an inviting option he decided to quietly exit his room and prepare a great breakfast since he wanted to heal his relationship with the bad-tempered, newly-arrived, redhead, Asuka was. One month had already passed and 3 angels had been fought against together since her arrival in Japan so he already new what made her happy, one of them was a good breakfast so he prepared what he thought was a typical thing Americans ate in the morning: bacon, eggs and some waffles with molten chocolate poured onto them. It took about 20 mins to finish cooking the hopefully "recipe of happiness for Asuka". Since he had still 5 minutes left before his two house-mates should've woken up he went to bathroom to have a shower. He was seriously thinking to start having a morning "tension dissipator" but he wouldn't feel good with himself doing such perv things in the morning each day, although it actually worked just thinking of the first time he saw a girl, a real girl, naked. Finished showering, he sped to the guest room that became a wardrobe room since they never had guests. 'Would be fun though, to have another male in this house, would make Asuka more bearable' He thought.

X

X

X

X

X

"Good morning Misato-san!" Shinji happily said.

"You too Shinji-kun" Katsuragi managed to say letting out a huge yawn.

"Hallo Asuka" The man of the house almost whispered afraid from her look.

"mnrmnmrh" Asuka groaned with a sharp look at Shinji, she wasn't really angry at him for what happened yesterday night, she too understood that what se was saying was totally dumb, but she was too stubborn and full of herself to let it go so easily. She sat down waiting for the maiden of the house (guess who!) to serve the breakfast; ready to start with her usual complaints, she was taken unprepared, she knew that he was a good 'chef' and that when he wanted to he could cook some amazing dishes, but she also knew that it took him about an hour, 'He probably is using this to apologize for yesterday' she thought. After the 2 girls had taken their places at the table, Shinji served their breakfasts, Asuka dived into it, Misato did the same but before that she drank the usual morning beer which today was a different one since her favourite one wasn't available at the market. "Yaaaaaaaahhhhh! This Kirin Bira is way better than any else in the world! Mmhnmhnmnnm! Deliciousssss!" Shinji was quiet scared each time the major did like that but he had to deal with it. The third Children was eating what he had just finished preparing when the redhead told him "Okay baka I accept your excuses, but just because I'm a sensitive and and nice person" Asuka said with a superior looking face. "Don't be so bold Asuka yesterday it totally wasn't Shinji in the wrong side" Misato stated looking at the proud EVA pilot. "Whatever" She said with non-chalance as of someone who thought he was the-best-in-the-world. "Hurry up in any case! You only got 5 minutes." Shinji had just finished eating when she said that. "Let me just get our bentos and we can go" He said cleaning his mouth, after getting their lunches, they gave their tutor a hug and exited the apartment.

 **End of chapter notes:** so…. this is the first chapter, hopefully I'll manage to do small weekly updates instead of doing huge chapters but only every two months.


	3. Some Incredible news

15 minutes after breakfast, Shinji and Asuka headed for school, walking slowly at First, then breaking into a run after realising that they only had 5 minutes to arrive at school on time. Luckily for them the sensei broke his wrist as he was going towards the class and slipped on a banana peel left "accidentally" on the stairs. By the time the two Eva pilots had arrived, their class could've gained the name of "trouble in paradise" (totally not referring to anyone *coffcoffWWEcoffcoff*) as the once perfectly tidy room, which kept like that thanks to the perfect class rep, Hikari Horaki, know looked as if a tornado had brought 20 wild bears with 2 honey combs each on their back inside the classroom. The 2 Childrens took their respective places. "Yooooo Shinji!" Toji suddenly cried as his second best friend was approaching.

"Morning Toji, how are you?" Shinji quietly answered.

"C'mon Shinji we're your best friends, ya don't need to be so formal" Kensuke bursted jumping out of his seat.

"Life is too nice to be spent thinking about behaving all time" The otaku shouted out loud jumping on a desk, attracting the attention of all the class,especially Hikari's who almost threw a chair against him intimating the military fan to get down from the table. Shinji, still crying from laughter, wondered why Kensuke was so excited that day. As if reading inside his mind, Toji said "he just discovered that in America they started the production of a certain Eva-05, apparently it's gonna be unique in it's genre cause of it's battery characteristics, or at least that's what I understood since he came here babbling about mechanical stuff". Before Shinji could start his sentence their sensei entered the room so everyone threw themselves ont the sits and Hikari's powerful voice greeted everyone's ears with the usual "rise, bow, sit". The teacher looked at everyone with half a angry and half in pain face, due to his broken wrist, then he calmly said " until the owner of the banana peel I slipped on this morning is going to come out, we'll be doing the first impact" At that statement everyone in the classroom let out a huge sigh and stared at their computers as the sensei started the lesson.

 **Entering chatroom app….**

 **loading…25%**

 **loading…50%**

 **loading…75%**

 **loading completed**

 **Entering chatroom OMFG:**

 **Shinji0-1 entered the room**

 **Gunslinger:** yooooooooo

 **Badbeast:** watcha wanted ta ask earlier

 **Badbeast:**?

 **Shinji0-1:** what about the EVA 05?

 **Gunslinger:** Apparently it's a new EVA model that has been made with the new S2 system which should allow an infinite battery life. Isn't it super cool!

 **Shinji0-1:** Yeah! Would be cool to try it.

 **Gunslinger:** I also heard that in about 1 months a new student should be coming.

 **Badbeast:** Really? ya didn't tell me

 **Shinji0-1:** Wait a minute… how do you now so many things

 **Gunslinger:** Weelllll… since my dad works at NERV he has a lot of info's about the city in general and also about anything relating EVAs ya know?

 **Badbeast:** Yeah I suppose that is plausible

 **ClassRepGirl entered the room**

 **ClassRepGirl:** Hallo Ikari, Aida, Suzuhara what were you talking about?

 **Badbeast:** About the fact that Kensuke seems to know a lot of top secret info about EVAs and about new students coming here.

 **ClassRepGirl:** Really? That is interesting, is it a boy or a girl?

 **Gunslinger:** A boy, apart from this I don't know anything about him.

 **ClassRepGirl:** Okay, can I invite Asuka?

 **Shinji0-1:** Fine

 **Badbeast:** Absolutely NOPE!

 **Gunslinger:** Kay

 **ClassRepGirl:** just a sec then

 **ClassRepGirl has invited ReDwArRiOr02**

 **ReDwArRiOr02 has entered the room**

 **ReDwArRiOr02:** Hikari did you really had to invite me in the room of morons?

 **ClassRepGirl:** Don't be so rude Asuka :-(

 **ReDwArRiOr02:** Well it's true

 **Badbeast:** Always so nice the devil isn't she?

 **ReDwArRiOr02:** Watcha say ya jock!

 **Badbeast:** The truth ;-))) B***h

As Toji had published his last message, (the "***" where in the original too because the chatroom app doesn't allow bad words) a pencil case perfectly hit him in the throat making him coff for a couple of seconds. "Do you need to go and drink some water Mr. Suzuhara?" "No I'm fine sensei" Toji answered the teacher still having trouble speaking due to the impact which was exactly onto his adam's pome.

 **ReDwArRiOr02:** Hope ya understood that you can't mess with the queen

 **Badbeast:** Go fac yourself

 **Shinji0-1:** Calm down guys you can continue talking during lunch can't you?

 **ReDwArRiOr02:** Good idea so I can straightaway break his wrist if he ever dares to call me like that again

 **Gunslinger:** Anyways guys can I invite Ayanami too? There's something I meed to ask all of you.

 **ReDwArRiOr02:** Invite wondergirl if you want to

 **Badbeast:** No prob

 **ClassRepGirl:** Certainly

 **Shinji0-1:** okay

 **Gunslinger has invited ReiAyanami**

 **ReiAyanami has entered the room**

 **ReiAyanami:** Good morning

 **ReDwArRiOr02:** Always the plain nickname wondergirl?

 **ReiAyanami:** It's the name it was given to me so why shall I want to change it?

 **ReDwArRiOr02:** To look a bit cooler maybe?

 **ReiAyanami:** I feel no need for that. In any case why did you invite me here?

 **Gunslinger:** This afternoon I need to tell all of you something really important that can't be said through a message

 **Gunslinger:** It's highly top secret so don't tell anyone okay

 **ReiAyanami:** I don't have anything programmed for today's afternoon. Where are we going to meet?

 **Gunslinger:** At a new bar they opened along the street which leads to the shopping center

 **Badbeast:** Think I heard about it. Is it called "101st Light"?

 **Gunslinger:** Yes. If anyone can't come write it otherwise don't

 **ClassRepGirl:** I can't sorry. This afternoon I need to take care of my younger sisters

 **Gunslinger:** Anyone else?

…

 **Gunslinger:** great. At 4PM then?

 **Shinji0-1:** Perfect

The 5 14years old were sitting at the table of a bar that had just opened. They were drinking a soda without talking, all of them daring some quick glances at Ayanami that usually didn't accept those type of invitations. Although truly small, the fact that she came there was because of a change in Rei's personality due to something that commander Ikari told her yesterday's night. The blue haired girl had been surprised by it and she had to admit that it was the first ever she experienced that feeling. The silence was suddenly ended by Kensuke

"I imagine you're wondering why I made you come here right?" With a conspiracy look on his face.

"We don't care go staright to the point!" An impatient Asuka yelled

"Okay, okay…. So...a couple of days ago, while I was looking around my father's stuff I discovered some files regarding the other NERV's of other countries" He said with some irritation in his voice since his glorious moment had been spoiled.

"and there was an article regarding the production of the EVA 05" The otaku was morally killed since noone seemed to react to such important news. 'well then let's drop the bomb'

"and with the new S2 generator installed it has an infinite battery power!"

A knife in front of him, good to cut his veins since AGAIN no reaction 'Fuck this shit' and he went off.

The group of friends, still careless of his news separated and headed towards their homes. Little they knew that in the karaoke cafe next to them Gendo Ikari was singing his favorite song 'gay bar'.

 **End of Chapter Notes:**

I know that for know the story will look pretty lame (and it's very likely for it to be) but I'm trying to take huge consideration of all the rewievs I received. Right now I'm only setting the outlines for the story. At last I'd like to thank Merchant of Blue Death who has been giving me good tips and offered to read my chapters so I owe him a lot.


End file.
